Meditations On Chocolate Part 2

The BEST Chocolates…

Fast forward a few years. A close friend of mine went to culinary school and then became a superb chocolatier. How lucky I am! The answer is obviously ‘pretty damned lucky’: for my 50th birthday, this very talented chocolatier made me 50 passionfruit truffles, my most favoritest chocolate. I tried not to eat them like popcorn, but I’ll just say that it was the Best Time… She makes the passionfruit truffles seasonally, but not predictably (she has some pesky science-y job that keeps her from making passionfruit truffles full time), and for awhile she made her chocolates with a partner who has since branched off into her own excellent chocolate business, including her own version of the pf truffle. I buy from both women. I’m that thoughtful.

A few years after I wrote the above email eulogizing the lovely wayward Valentine’s chocolates, I thought to show the email to my good friend, who then asked me to take a shot at writing newer, jazzier descriptions for her chocolates. The result, restrained as it was, was not deemed suitable for use at that time, whereupon my husband was inspired to write his own wilder and unrestrained version of the chocolate descriptions. Finally, our friend Ralph of Urban Crows weighed in with his own thoughts on the matter. The progression, from sanity to madness, follows.

THE CHOCOLATES’ EVOLUTION

Original Descriptions

SIGNATURE TRUFFLES (original descriptions) Champagne – silky dark-milk ganache infused with Marc de Champagne and enrobed in dark chocolate. Perfection.

Highland Scotch – White chocolate ganache infused with fresh vanilla beans and single malt scotch and enrobed in dark chocolate. Simply sublime.

Tanzanie – A dark ganache made from a 75% single origin cacao from Tanzania, Africa. Creamy with a subtle hint of banana.

Salted Caramel with Wild Turkey Bourbon – Vanilla caramel infused with Wild Turkey Bourbon, enrobed in dark chocolate and garnished with fleur de sel. Sweet and wild!

Passionfruit – White chocolate and passionfruit ganache, enrobed in dark chocolate. A trip to the tropics.

SOLID CHOCOLATE TASTING GIFT BOXES
A tasting gift box for 2-4 people ($20.00 per box) – each box contains 24 pieces of solid single origin chocolate (4 pieces each of 2 milk and 4 dark chocolates), a description of each chocolate, plus instructions on how to do a chocolate tasting – a chocolate experience to share with family and friends.

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My Interpretation

Ooh la la!  The night they invented this Champagne truffle was a divine night.  These flavour nuggets, packed with silky dark-milk ganache that has been infused with Marc de Champagne and then enrobed in dark chocolate, will render you speechless (at any rate, you should refrain from speech while your mouth is full of Champagne truffle. Instead, be in The Moment.). When you regain your powers of speech, you will use them to request another Champagne truffle.

Turkey in the straw? Turkey in the hay? How about Wild Turkey, plucked from crinkling paper where it rustled about contentedly until reaching its destiny:  a lucky mouth where its wild nature is unleashed. Confidently tamed by ____’s understanding hand, this morsel allows you to savour the experience of bourbon that has mated with lightly salted caramel, been lovingly enveloped in gorgeous dark chocolate plumage and then finished with a sprinkling of fleur de sel.  Need 110% proof that bourbon-infused salty sweetness should be on everyone’s bucket list? Gobble, gobble, gobble, indeed!

Aye, Lasses and Lads, I would walk 500 miles for this truffle! The Highland Scotch truffle performs lively moves on one’s palate, like a babbling brook running the moors:  its white chocolate ganache filling moving smoothly, swiftly in harmony along a current of fresh vanilla bean with eddies of single malt scotch to meet the dark chocolate shore. You will doff your tam in homage to this “tartantalizing” truffle.

Go on. Take a bite and explore the dark mysteries of Tanzanie Truffle. You shall discover subtle notes of banana lingering beneath a creamy dark ganache, created from a 75% single origin cacao from Tanzania, Africa. You know Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness? This is the exact OPPOSITE of that!

The Passion Fruit truffle makes clear its intent and pulls no punches as you crunch through the dark chocolate shell to reveal a lush, piquant passion fruit filling.  Your mouth is flooded with essence of passionfruit, its tartness the perfect complement to the dark chocolate invitation issued. The promise of passion — pledged when your fingers first closed about that innocent-looking truffle — is thus fulfilled.

My Husband’s Interpretation

When our friend read these, she spat out her coffee (in a good way).

Highland Scotch It’s the holiday season and that means another year of Uncle Charlie slumped over the sofa, drooling after having one too many.  Just before he attempts to grope you, you eye this white chocolate ganache infused with fresh vanilla and the good single malt that Charlie hasn’t found. Happy Holidays!

Salted Caramel with Wild Turkey Boubon On Sunday afternoons after coming home from church, momma would cook up a big batch of fried chicken while you’d sneak into the barn and bang your cousin Jolene.  Sweet and wild!  Yes, she was — just like this vanilla caramel infused with Wild Turkey bourbon…

Tanzanie Poachers run rampant as they score another rhino to fuel the global markets. If only they knew the value of this dark ganache made from 75% single origin cacao, sourced from right under their noses.  Creamy, with a subtle hint of banana.

Champagne The French and food go together like… Shamalamalama and wapply ding dong — so we put a bit of the french right into this silky dark milk ganache — infused with the actual sweat of Marc Champagne, my cousin from Lyon. Almost perfection.

Chocolate Tasting Gift Box A tasting gift box for 2-4 people, or 4-8 people if you cut each piece in half, or 8-16 people if you cut the half-pieces in half, or 16-32 people if you cut the quarter pieces in half… Yes, it takes a village…

Ralph’s Interpretation

Ralph’s contributions played on some special new varieties that our friend had just released. Very yummy, although Ralph’s descriptions belie this fact.

Fruit Nougatine – Think Sassy, think Gay, think Nuts. If Maine and Maryland could vote for their favourite flavour, it’d be this one. Felch your way to a world of well-balanced chewy goodness.

After 7:59 –The office party is over, the hangover begins. The full horror of who you’ve shagged in the photocopy room is beginning to dawn on you. What better to cleanse your tainted palate of those earthy flavours than fresh mint leaves? Comes with dental floss.

Roasted Orange – Cross burning meets Florida oranges. Need we say more?

Yuzu Marzipan – The Sumo Wrestler of our Christmas range. Candied yuzu dotted through with fine marzipan like angry spots on Akebono’s bum, lovingly enrobed in a dark chocolate loin cloth. A full-contact twist on a classic combination.

It does take a village!